My fruit adventures may be over for now, but my vegetable ones are not. I’m going to continue eating several servings per day, especially now that I bought some digestive enzymes! I got two types – one that helps digest protein, fat, dairy and carbs, and another one that helps digest veggies and beans and prevents bloating/gas.
Although my heartburn and stomach pains have finally gone away, so I may not need them.
Anyway, I’ve been running around a lot today and didn’t get a chance to eat lunch. It seems appetite suppression has already kicked in from doing low carb because I actually forgot about lunch. So for dinner, I’m planning to have a large salad and some eggs. I’ve been looking up some recipes online and have decided to experiment a bit with salad ingredients. Tonight’s salad is likely going to have:
- Two kinds of lettuce – butter leaf and red leaf
- Baby spinach leaves
- A few slices of strawberries (so few that the carb count won’t matter)
- Sliced cucumber
- Slices of roma tomatoes
- Fresh mint leaves
- Slices of red pepper
- Grated carrots (If I can find my grater!)
- A little bit of olive oil drizzled on top
- Sunflower and sesame seeds sprinkled on top
Mmmm… does that not sound delicious and inventive (at least for me)? I will take a photograph of the salad if it comes out looking good!
I also got some raspberry vinaigrette and a roasted red pepper & artichoke bruschette topping to try on future salads, plus some other fresh herbs I haven’t tried before. I really need to get my Aerogarden set up so I can grow my own!
While at Akin’s earlier, I grabbed some organic teas – a sleepytime tea with passion fruit & chamomile, a blueberry leaf tea, and some parsley tea. (I love parsley – it really helps with water retention and bloating!)
So, something interesting happened while I was out running errands. Some people I [sort of] knew from my old AA group called me. They told me they knew the reason I had stopped coming to meetings (T and another friend who turned out to be a total nutcase) and said that they miss me, want me to start coming back and want me to be sober and happy. I told them that I haven’t had a problem staying sober lately and was generally happy, so why go to meetings? They acted like they didn’t believe me. (Not in a mean way).
Now I can’t but wonder if someone there has been reading this blog, or perhaps someone saw me going into a liquor store last week when I was buying wine? I mentioned in a couple of previous posts that I had had a couple glasses of Riesling a few nights ago, and another night last week had three glasses of organic chardonnay. That is hardly getting drunk or needing AA, as far as I can see it.
They were really nice and said they missed me a lot. But the phone call sounded like an intervention! Grrr. I know they are worried, but at the same time, just because I don’t go to meetings doesn’t mean I’m depressed or out getting drunk. Quite the opposite, in fact.
I’m sorry to say this, but the majority of the people in the AA program I was going to seem to have either traded their addiction for another one (excessive caffeine, smoking or serial dating) or are horribly self-absorbed people that I wouldn’t want to be anything like even if I never touched another drink in my life. Then there are the ones who have true mental illness. Am I wrong for wanting to separate myself from that? Am I wrong for wanting to focus on other things in life and not worry about ‘not drinking’ every single day? The stringent program and worrying about ‘not drinking’ only made me want to drink even more. My worst binge-drinking episodes were the ones I had during “relapses” in the program.
I don’t know… maybe I’m only fooling myself. But for now I’m OK. Life is OK, I have a spiritual connection with my HP, and there are a good many other things to do in life than stress out over alcohol. And I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to enjoying a couple of glasses of wine maybe once or twice a week. I learned some really good things from the program while I was in it, such as to not hold grudges or resentments. Before doing my 4th step back in July 2008, I was holding an awful lot of resentment towards various people and things in my past. But today, I can honestly say I hold none. And anytime I do incur a new grudge or anger against someone else, I pray for them for a few nights in a row, and the grudge/anger goes away! (This truly works, by the way.)
Anyway… I told them I may show up to a noon meeting sometime soon. But I doubt I will. If I went to a meeting now I’d be a hypocrite, anyway.
Enough updating for now… I think it’s time to get dinner started. (Although to be honest, I’m still not hungry!)
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