Please note in advance that I have emphasized (bolded and italicized) a lot in this post, for the reason that it needs to be emphasized. Writing out my weight story has enabled me to identify what my major problem is (with weight and food):
I don’t know how to eat correctly in order to keep my weight down. My constant weight fluctuations have proved this.
The odd thing is that my parents fed us very well – well meaning “healthy”. We ate 3 square (but not overly large) meals per day that all had fruit and/or veggies, protein and carbs in them. We were allowed to eat an occasional snack, but nothing with too much sugar. After Halloween, for example, we could only eat a few pieces of candy per night. We also weren’t allowed to drink full-sugar soda.
So what went wrong? Why did I choose subconsciously NOT to learn to eat properly? (I will have to give this one some thought).
I need to learn how to eat nutritionally and at a level that will not only enable me to lose all my extra weight, but stay slim from that point forward. I know I have a long road ahead of me – the rest of my life. And I’m OK with that.
Therefore, I have made an important decision: When I get back to Tulsa (which will be next week), I will be looking around for either a nutrition class, or make an appointment with a nutritionist. Obviously I don’t have a friggin’ clue what I am doing when it comes to healthy eating and maintaining a healthy weight! (On a separate side note, I actually ordered the “Nutrition Bible” from Amazon over the summer, but it arrived one day that I wasn’t home and someone in my apartment building stole it. Bastards.)
OK, onto my story conclusion…
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So, it took them 2 days to finally release me from the hospital after my Hyponatremia diagnosis. I followed up with a new doctor a few times. She said that she wanted to send me to a Neurologist. But unfortunately, I had no money at that time, so I didn’t go.
Anyway… I maintained my weight around 135-140 for a while. When I started TheSkinnyWebsite in 2005, I probably weighed about 135, which isn’t a bad weight for me. I was in a size 4 or 6 and well within my normal BMI range.
But inevitably, I gained weight back. Fast-forward to summer of 2006 – I was 28 years old. My weight had gotten back up to 145 or so – not much more than that. I could still fit in my size 7 and 8’s (for the most part). I started drinking a lot with friends that summer – we partied every day – but also, I rode a bicycle almost every day with friends. So despite the fact that I ate whatever I wanted and drank lots of alcohol, I actually slimmed down because of the bike riding. I remember one day I woke up and my size 7’s were almost falling off me. (I always get a dramatic, overnight sudden weight loss like that).
I got a bunch of compliments that day, like “wow you have lost weight” and “wow, your waist is tiny now!”. I got on the scale that day and funnily enough, I had only lost 5 pounds. I guess that goes to show that you can slim down considerably with exercise but barely lose any scale weight… (something I am experiencing right now).
However, I stopped riding my bike in October – it got too cold. My partying and eating whatever I wanted continued. Over that particular fall season – 2006 – I gained about 25 pounds in a record time. What caused it was that I would eat unhealthy food, get NO exercise, and drink a lot at night with friends. Then – to make matters ten times worse – I would get the beer/alcohol munchies really badly right before bed and eat tons of junk.
Ever since last fall, I have been battling this much higher weight range. I went several months without really caring, because I was a little depressed and had other things on my mind. One day I got on the scale and it said 172. That was at my friend’s house, whose scale was 5 pounds under!!!
That was the last straw. Since that time, )which was around the time I started this blog), I have been going on diets, losing weight, then giving up and gaining it back for whatever reason. I didn’t start an exercise routine, however, until three weeks ago. (Actually probably about a month and a half because while I was in Tulsa in September, I would go for power walks several days each week).
Fast forward to now…
I am, it seems, a victim of yoyo-dieting and a slowed metabolism. I myself am responsible for my bad eating and laziness, and I am certainly paying for it. But on my 30th birth three weeks ago, I had an epiphany:
I’m now 30. I don’t have any more time to screw around with my health. People in their 30’s have heart attacks and strokes, sometimes! If I continue like this – yoyo’ing around and NOT exercising – I will pay a price with eventual obesity and all kinds of health problems. This needs to stop, NOW.
I am happy to report that since my b-day and self pep-talk, it has. And I truly feel different this time – like I mean business. Also, for the first time in my entire life, I am making a HUGE effort to exercise most days for over an hour.
Will I succeed?
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On a scary side note, I am currently contemplating if I should go to ER. I looked up my symptoms from last night and Monday night and several of them actually point to… either heart failure, or a heart attack! What!!??
